hello monday
Sep. 30th, 2019 08:13 pmon the flipside, sometimes being too positive backfires on me too. I gotta quit saying things're fine when they're not, bc it makes it real hard to actually check in and catch myself being unhealthy. Today I realised just how easy it would be for me to slip back into disordered eating and tell myself it was actually smart and healthy for various reasons. it's bogus how hard it is to kick that voice out for good! But it's buuulllllllll. remember to eat, yall!
But in properly better news!
Over the weekend, I got to see my folks in the opera put on Falstaff! It was so good to see them in a comedy for once; we had a long run of dramatic tragedies - Consul, Giovanna d'Arco, Luisa Miller, Capuletti, so on - but the fairy dress for Nanetta was so cool, with gauzy wings! And last time I'd seen Falstaff was as Scarpia and that sort of role, so it was a trip to get to laugh at him. And I remember Bardolfo's first production, two whole companies ago, and it's so great to see how he's grown as a vocalist and actor both! It was pretty strange to be in the hall and not be working though; last time I wasn't in the show, I still tagged in for tech and did curtains for a night, because I can read a score and I know where to stick to the shadows in that space. But this was the first time I've only been in the audience in the hall since ?Figaro? four or five years ago!
But I still jumped up to load out; I love being involved in the theater too much to just sit back the whole time lmao. And I got to chat with this run's SD, and side note: I admire fabulous older gays so much. There's a very short list of people who can call me 'girl', but it actually makes me feel so safe, coming from folks who, and I quote, 'did [their] time being nice and quiet, back in the 80s'. We are in the same boat, and one day I will be that confident too. This is the first season I've been out as trans with the company, and GD's partner went full dad joke 'nice to meet you' when we all went for thai afterwards. I love this crew, and I've really got to stay involved with the opera community here. There are so many good people, once you know where to look.
AND
GUESS WHAT
I got my assignment for NiF Exchange! I can't wait to write all about
Also, I realised I still have all those post-its sticking out of Annihilation, so I should go back and synthesize those a bit. What a weird story, what great atmosphere, I had things I wanted to write there too!
I know I'm a broken record, but you guys. Finding time to be creative literally keeps me sane. I hope everyone has good outlets too!!