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0denseIt's a beautiful spring to be 26! Good? Fortunate? I said beautiful, not political. But it's hot and sunny and the caldendula that I seeded are coming up and I got to sit on grass and talk to a friend, so those are the auspices I'm taking. I still feel like trying to make a roll cake this weekend, but for this evening, we had the lemon tart from the bakery across the street from what used to be my preschool - 25 years we've been going there!
My birthday has been in the middle of finals crunch for ages now, so I haven't done much party for that long either, but I would very very much like to be able to go up to the park and have a picnic with my folks. One time we had tea all sitting in trees, how's that for distancing?? Or more likely we might be able to see who has the most yard, and make that a thing. I don't know, I'll take whatever it is. We'll make something work when we can.
It usually takes some time for me to feel like a new age, after a birthday. But this year, I feel like the concept of 25-year-old-Eric has been over since we went into lockdown. Like, at the staff meeting this morning, someone said that looking at their previous monthly reports felt like handling a ghost's papers, some sort of past life. I feel that. 25-year-old-Eric was living in another world. Lockdown still feels a bit like limbo (wasn't that a trippy Lent) but now I know more about being a-person-in-lockdown, which is what 26-year-old-Eric has been born into. I don't know how long this will actually take to get through, but this episode of life has landed in 26-year-old-Eric's hands. One year was East Coast Touring Choir Year. One year was Medical Year. One year was Graduating With Two AAs / Transfering To Uni Year. One year was Working Year. 26 is Plague Year.
Like everyone, this wasn't supposed to be Plague Year. I'm supposed to be halfway through a five year plan that includes grad school, and that's had a huge wrench thrown in the works. Shockingly, international upheval can cause mental illness flare-ups. At least I have a toolkit to deal with that, by now, even when it still sucks. I'll still finish the plans I made, maybe not when I'd wanted, but I didn't exactly factor in *waves hand at the world in general*.
Most birthdays don't come with an explicit mission. Like, I'd have a plan for the year, but this month alone has a lot of transitions for newly-26-Eric to take on. So, it's Plague Year? It's Plague Year, then. Andreia, filoi. We've named the monster. Now to fight it.
Birthday bop!
My birthday has been in the middle of finals crunch for ages now, so I haven't done much party for that long either, but I would very very much like to be able to go up to the park and have a picnic with my folks. One time we had tea all sitting in trees, how's that for distancing?? Or more likely we might be able to see who has the most yard, and make that a thing. I don't know, I'll take whatever it is. We'll make something work when we can.
It usually takes some time for me to feel like a new age, after a birthday. But this year, I feel like the concept of 25-year-old-Eric has been over since we went into lockdown. Like, at the staff meeting this morning, someone said that looking at their previous monthly reports felt like handling a ghost's papers, some sort of past life. I feel that. 25-year-old-Eric was living in another world. Lockdown still feels a bit like limbo (wasn't that a trippy Lent) but now I know more about being a-person-in-lockdown, which is what 26-year-old-Eric has been born into. I don't know how long this will actually take to get through, but this episode of life has landed in 26-year-old-Eric's hands. One year was East Coast Touring Choir Year. One year was Medical Year. One year was Graduating With Two AAs / Transfering To Uni Year. One year was Working Year. 26 is Plague Year.
Like everyone, this wasn't supposed to be Plague Year. I'm supposed to be halfway through a five year plan that includes grad school, and that's had a huge wrench thrown in the works. Shockingly, international upheval can cause mental illness flare-ups. At least I have a toolkit to deal with that, by now, even when it still sucks. I'll still finish the plans I made, maybe not when I'd wanted, but I didn't exactly factor in *waves hand at the world in general*.
Most birthdays don't come with an explicit mission. Like, I'd have a plan for the year, but this month alone has a lot of transitions for newly-26-Eric to take on. So, it's Plague Year? It's Plague Year, then. Andreia, filoi. We've named the monster. Now to fight it.
Birthday bop!
