stress? who's that???

[0dense]

guess whose interview for promotion is finally coming up? and guess who's .....actually decently confident that he's got a good shot at it, but also convinced that he's making a professional fool of himself??
it's meeeeeeeeeee
it's happening, I'm going in and sitting down for real tomorrow, putting my cards on the table and myself into the hands of the promotion circle. Knocking wood and going to bed relatively early, for best shot at it!

anxiolytic measures I found today: 

• reached almost 6k on the doc for my sad mystery project
  • that includes my notes to self and such, so the actual prose of it is lower, but still, wordcount is rising and I'm pleased with that! Short and sweet is well and good for character studies, but I'm getting to develop my dynamic more, now :) I love these sad dudes so much the more I get to know them, why am I doing these things them
  • I've been having a dilemma about exactly how sad to make this section, though. I could A) keep what I've got, even though it doesn't have the same level of Drama as my other idea, because it's really not bad material and I can make it work with a little more tweaking. also it was a pain to write and I don't want to throw it away. B) start over and replace it with something both solidly sad and even kinda bad which would also give my last scene, which is already very both sad and bad, all the more justification. In my defense for the badness, for once I wouldn't be giving them anything I haven't had myself so like, ¯\_(ツ)_/¯. 
  • C) is, of course, finishing and posting what I've got so far, and then adding the other scene for further development, buut I'm not sure on that. Or, I'd like to have a full first draft before adding scenes that weren't blocked. There's a beat I'm going for in this section, and I'm not confident I wouldn't derail myself by going off-book without more concrete idea of what I'm really working towards. idk.
• returned to a half-baked doc and realised there's something decent there if I can remember where it was supposed to be going
  • the general is a lot of fun to write?? 
• watched some Avatar with shorm
  • every time I wander back towards Avatar, it stands out more and more that they're such little kids!
  • also, zuko sounds a hair like balem abraxas, which is hilarious

and regardless of how tomorrow goes, when I get back from the city, sister and I are going to the new tea shop to try their parfaits. so that's something to look forward to!

Comments

[yuuago]

It's great that you feel confident about it. :D GOOD LUCK.

I don't have any suggestions for the fic options, alas. ...Follow your heart? xD

[0dense]

thank you!! you know, I think I even put a good face forward :D I did my best and I trust my supervisor's judgements on the candidate pool, so one way or another, I'm sure something good'll come of it :)

my heart: write a whole other finale With the extra-sad part, but turn it into a happier ending
my head: you're right but I already wrote an end and I like it!
my heart: too bad!!
so who knows what I'll end up with ;D